Okay, again, totally oblivious. So there is this Lesbian secret code world which I am not privy to, in fact I stopped getting the Lamdaily News after the first year "toster-oven" trial subscription ended, when Team Dresch broke up, and I moved to Chicago. So, in San Francisco, when a girl talks about her girlfriend, or the women she is dating, and tells me how open their relationship is, it means.
a) She is an open and secure person, and I should admire and delight in this drama-free handsome relationship and think very wonderful things about the two of them.
b) She has no idea where the relationship is going, and maybe I should offer advice.
c) She wants to rip off my clothes and toss me onto her dirty sheets.